Lainey’s ShameF-ck Got Some Shameful Tats

Lainey Posted by Lainey at September 15, 2009 06:48:00 September 15, 2009 06:48:00

My friends and I occasionally play the game of “If I were to get a tattoo, it would be a…”

I once made the mistake of saying I wanted a mermaid tattoo, to which I was laughed right out of the room. I blame Madison for that one. I mean, seeing Darryl Hannah unfurl her tail in that bathtub scene in Splash had me re-enacting that for weeks. Okay, years. Okay, I still do it and pretend that Tom Hanks is knocking at the door as I furiously dry my legs with a hairdryer.

But still. Not once has anyone ever proclaimed that they wanted a giant feather running up and down their arm.

No, really. Ed Westwick should have gotten tattoos of a douchebag on himself since that’s basically what these new additions make him out to be.

I just don’t get the feather. Is he a molting bird? When he flaps his arm, will it look like he’s flying? It’s way too big the way it extends from his shoulder all the way to his elbow. That’s gonna be one saggy feather in a couple of years. It’ll be like a feather taken from my pillow, which I’ve had since I was 13 and hug every night and give a new name to on a weekly basis. Currently, it’s called Lorenzo.

On his other arm we find a topless pin-up girl. Nothing says class like tits inked onto a not very defined bicep.

Ed must have gotten inspired earlier in the day when he watched Whitney’s interview on Oprah, and went out and laced a joint with cocaine and came up with these sh-tty tattoo ideas.

Sorry Ed, I know you want Zac Ephron’s body and all, but LipGloss would never get these stupid markings on his precious skin, m’okay kay?


Written by Alan W
Photos from Source

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