Worst Hair Male: Joaquin Phoenix

Lainey Posted by Lainey at January 16, 2006 12:00:00 January 16, 2006 12:00:00
OK. So he didn’t look his best tonight. But the poor thing was felled by the flu last week…can you blame him?? Honestly though, I don’t know what was up with the hair. Even I could scarcely summon a spark in my loins. Still…when Reese won and he looked up at her with that smoldering intensity, my desire returned in flames. Then John Travolta had to ruin things by groping him like bitch in heat and once again, my ring of fire was extinguished. The surprising news is that Joaquin won and Heath lost. Which means my man is well positioned for Oscar. Philip Seymour Hoffman may have a slight critical edge, but Oscar voters are NOT the foreign press. And so I will wait for my boyfriend to redeem himself on March 5th. Stay tuned y’all…

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