Ethan Hawke. At the premiere of Clive in New York. He directs and stars in the play. The play is not about Billy Idol.

Ethan Hawke used to be my jam. It was that movie, right? That f-cking movie. When, at 21, you don’t know any better. That was before the sh-tty erotica. Some crushes though, they leave a stain. Something you can’t rub off. I know he is vile. But that past attraction embedded itself in my DNA or something because, OH GOD GROSS, I think I still would...

I am looking at this sh-t and I cannot deny that I think I still would.

Is it self-loathing?