What is the point of Eva Longoria? What is the reason for Eva Longoria? Is there a reason for Eva Longoria?

I don’t understand.

Like, this dress. This dress, the colour, this colour is for food. Some food colours don’t belong on a dress. This food colour doesn’t belong on this dress. I would eat it. I wouldn’t wear it.

Pageant fashion needs to die.

And the hair. Her hair makes Angelina Jolie’s hair youthful. The hair…

Does Ken Paves work in a small town salon? Is this where he services his clients? Because on which carpet, aside from the daytime soap opera awards, is that updo acceptable? Not even for a bride, you know?

Not even for a bride!!!

Put an end to the misery. Please. No more Eva Longoria. Make it go away. Make it stay on tv where it belongs. Make it learn from Marg Helgenberger.

The end.

Photos from Wenn.com