This is Russell Brand following a performance in London last night. And Geri Halliwell today at a park with her daughter. Last week, according to the UK tabloids, the two were supposedly “very serious” - click here for a refresher. This week, according to the UK tabloids, the two are “cooling”. Make up your f-cking mind!

Apparently Russell is too intense for freestyle Geri. Like she only wants to do the yoga with him but he wants to keep on meditating after the session is over. This is not a euphemism for sex. This is actually, per the British gossips, the situation: Russell wants to read scriptures and she’s not that into it.

Many of you emailed last week asking about their relationship, questioning how two people could go from the closing ceremony at the Olympics to “very serious” in a week. Not like that never happens for civilians, but that it seems to happen with such regularity for celebrities. But remember how much they work. Or how little they work. If you meet a person who interests you, it might be a few days in between dates etc because, well, you have sh-t to do -- school, work, whatever.

Many, if not most, celebrities have hours upon hours to kill. Geri Halliwell in particular, she made her fortune a decade ago. There is no hustle right now. There’s no to-do list. There’s no deadline. There’s all the time in the world, literally, to fall in love. And so that process is often accelerated. Interestingly enough, maybe that explains the speed of it on the other side. They fall out of love rather quickly too.