There’s a really funny story over at US Weekly right now. The headline:

Exclusive: Gwyneth Paltrow Is Bored With Acting, Wants an Empire Like Jessica Simpson

Gwyneth Paltrow wants to be like Jessica Simpson?
Gwyneth Paltrow is modelling her career after her?

According to a source, “(Gwyneth) admires Jessica's empire. She wants to make a killing."

By farting around all day and, as Maria would say, “failing up”?

Apparently G has “lost her passion for movies”. Once she finishes up with her next few films, she’ll apparently giv’er on taking over the world with GOOP and her fitness company (partnering with Tracy Anderson).

Is Stephen Huvane fuming right now? Huvane is G’s publicist. And my G, my G who is best friends with Beyonce and Stella McCartney, the caviar to Jessica’s fast food, my G is now being presented as someone who aspires to be Jessica Simpson? A student studying the Jessica Simpson career path???

And the suggestion that money is the motivation -- where in Gwyneth’s circles, money is never a discussion, because it’s taken for granted, like running water -- is straight up undignified. 

It’s embarrassing, non?

Who is f-cking with Gwyneth Paltrow?