Were you hoping for something pervy? It’s sexy… but not pervy. And probably full of sh*t…but still, Gwyneth Paltrow went to Selfridges and paid just over a hundred dollars for a “C” tattoo on her top of her thigh? Just before the private zone?

According to the Steve Flannery, that’s what she wanted. So he gave it to her, spending 20 minutes etching the initial on a nervous Gwynnie who insisted to Steve that the “C” stood for Chris. Can you imagine Gwyneth Paltrow hitting up Selfridges and leaving with a tattoo?

I get the tattoo. But at Selfridges? Not at home? In lieu of yoga beats zenning up the living room and the insistence on organic disinfectant, she had her tat etched in public with civilian germs contaminating her superior flesh… does this sound like my Gwyneth?

File photo attached. And before you ask… THAT is a Balenciaga. She received it before anyone else. Of course.