Had dinner with the girls recently… Julie is pregnant, Erin is a doula, and she suggested that before the baby comes, we all get together for some kind of chick bond. Something about feeling and sharing. I asked her if she wanted me to bring my spirit drum to ring in the joy, to help us dance around like no one’s watching.

Maybe it’s because I’m dead inside…but talking to the ocean has never been my thing. Which is why I don’t get Oprah. Which is why when I read about my Gwyneth “nourishing the inner aspect”, I died a little inside.

Not that it doesn’t make sense…

Gwyneth has launched a lifestyle website. Of course she has.

Who wouldn’t want Gwyneth’s life? Why wouldn’t Gwyneth think that everyone else wants her life?

She calls it GOOP: an attitude, an approach to living, to loving, and to learning applied to food, travel, fitness, shopping, playing, and parenting.

In her words:

Goop. A collection of experiences. Goop. What makes life good.

My life is good because I am not passive about it. I want to nourish what is real, and I want to do it without wasting time. I love to travel, to cook, to eat, to take care of my body and mind, to work hard. I love being a mother who has to overcome my bad qualities to be a good mother. I love being in spaces that are clean and nice.
Make your life good. Invest in what’s real. Cook a meal for someone you love. Pause before reacting. Clean out your space. Read something beautiful. Treat yourself to something. Go to a city you’ve never been to. Learn something new. Don’t be lazy. Workout and stick with it. GOOP. Make it great.

And the MiniVan Majority will eat that sh*t up. Because for some reason, stating the obvious these days is highly f&cking original.

Believe in yourself; Surround yourself with positive energy; Love what you are; See other places.

But only AFTER someone else tells you to. Because it would never have occurred to you otherwise. Is that the secret?


Gwyneth’s first GOOP newsletter will be released on Thursday.