Halle Berry will be presenting on Sunday. It will be her 9th appearance at the Oscars in 16 years. Is she JLo? Please. Halle has an Oscar. When you have one, it’s not the same as never being nominated and showing up for a decade. Let’s review. She’s our latest Oscar retrospective:  

In lavender for her first time. I’m trying to remember how I would have felt about this back then. I mean, tastes have changed now, right? Like today I’m saying, sh-t, what’s going on with the cheapness? But it’s not always fair to judge certain looks with new-old eyes.

OK but I can say for sure, even with new-old eyes that I would never have approved of this one.

Or this one.

This was the year. This was the dress that pretty much MADE Elie Saab. I love it. I don’t love it on its own though. I love it on HER. NO ONE ELSE IN THE WORLD could have made this sh-t work.

She returned as the reigning Best Actress. She once again wore Saab. A gold one strap situation. And with then-husband Eric Benet too. That Oscar Best Actress Curse they always talk about hadn’t kicked in yet. She would leave him 6 months later.

Here’s what I don’t understand - this silver gown is Versace...but for the colour, it’s pretty much exactly the same as the gold one strap Saab she wore two years previous. Not sure what the rationale for that would be. Oh yeah, remember when she had long hair?

Guess. Come on. You know. Because I hate it. So...naturally... Marchesa. Look how unflattering the chest detail is. Nahla was 1. She and Gabriel obviously hadn’t started hating each other yet. And goddamn they were great to look at, weren’t they?

Duana and I just site searched from last year to remember how we thought about this dress. Hilariously, we looked at these pictures and were like, God, that is gross, we hate it. A beat. And then, did, gulp, we like it last year? No, actually, we didn’t. Because it was feathered and tulled and another Marchesa.

So what will it be this time?

I’m going to say... slinky and tight. Versace. Click here to see the collection. First dress.

And your prediction?