Dear Gossips,

What do you want to talk about today?

Want to talk about how I wish I had a dire wolf and would give up all gifts for the rest of my life in exchange for one? Probably not.

Or how about Selena Gomez and...Orlando Bloom? Not that either. 

Chris Martin speaking obliquely about consciously uncoupling from Gwyneth Paltrow? Maybe. But later.

George Clooney is engaged. This is the only headline in gossip, right? Ok. We'll get to that in first post, with some exclusive details.

But before that, California, I’m on my knees for you! The squawk and gossip session at Book Soup in LA on Friday night, in the gossip capital, was balls-out amazing. And then you sold out Book Passage in San Francisco on Saturday afternoon, the best way to end the first leg of the US book tour! Thank you, love you, owe you. After three weeks, Listen To The Squawking Chicken is still in the Top 5 of the Canadian Bestseller List. Please know how I much I appreciate your support. Please know how much the Squawking Chicken appreciates it too. We’ve had a few health setbacks lately and there’s a big scan coming up this week. It has been an encouragement to her to keep fighting. So that she can keep showing off. We are profoundly grateful to you for this lift.

Speaking of books… I’ve written before about a book by Jane Bussmann called The Worst Date Ever. Click here for a refresher. It’s not “chick lit”. But she does talk about what an asshole Ashton Kutcher is and how that led her to Uganda and a crusade against Joseph Kony …in a much more sensitive way than, ahem, Chelsea Handler. People in North America were afraid of Bussmann’s story – which pretty much means it’s a MUST READ. Finally though, Bussmann’s book is available in the US, though with a different title. Same hilarious narrative though. A Journey to the Dark Heart of Nameless Unspeakable Evil: Charities, Hollywood, Joseph Kony, and Other Abominations is available now – click here. Nicholas Kristof of The New York Times called it “moving and hilarious”. The Guardian describes it as ''That rarest of things. . . a comedy that is truly funny”. And Jane is performing in LA this week. The show is AMAZING. Click here for tickets.

Yours in gossip,