Dear Gossips,

It’s August 8th. 8/8. It’s the luckiest day of the year. What’s going to happen? I’ve been holding my breath all week...

Today’s Olympic faces:

Elena Isinbayeva: a gracious queen steps down.

Sally Pearson: giving Australia a reason to cheer yesterday after what’s been called a sh-tty Games so far. Also I’ve now decided that a female hurdler’s body is the target. They’re lean, sure, but there’s a lot happening in the back, did you notice? That was one solid line of crazy asses. 

Yours in gossip,


PS. As previously mentioned, I’ve been writing for vitaminwater on their Tumblr page. My latest piece is about how to avoid having people hate you on the golf course. Please pass it on to your golfing friends. Click here to read.