Dear Gossips,

Miss Piggy has the most beautiful skin. Up close it’s flawless. And it’s very hard to resist the urge to touch. But you’re not really supposed to touch. You can ask. But if you get too close and f-ck up her hair, well, I’m sorry for you, I really am. Because Piggy travels with a bigger entourage than Mimi. And her hairstylist is ON IT. I’ve never seen anyone so alert, so focused, so committed to the job.

We interviewed Piggy on The Social yesterday. Click here to watch the video, the final clip at the bottom of the link. As you can see, Piggy will not hesitate to shut you down. It’s so refreshing to interview a celebrity with a real personality.

So I’m inside two weeks before delivering my book baby, Listen To The Squawking Chicken. I’ve tried not to talk about my book baby too much but, you know, it’s the hormones. I can’t help it. It’s biology, ok? I also realised yesterday that I haven’t even belly-cupped my book baby yet. Both of them.

It’s a beautiful thing, carrying these words inside of me, truly feeling like WOMAN, W-O-M-A-N, for the very first time. So I couldn’t help myself. I had to close my eyes, I had to BE ONE with my child. I imagined us dancing in the rain and running after the rainbow. It’s not a true belly-cup however until a man reaches around and cups the bump with you. I shared this moment with Kwame, our floor director on The Social. And even though Kwame’s not the father of my book baby (my book baby is an immaculate conception), he too was swept up in the emotion. Cradling our book baby together, we shared the pride. We beamed at each other with the kind of closeness that can only be experienced when two people merge and create.

Don’t forget, my book baby will be born in Canada on April 1! Click here for yesterday’s post about the book baby tour!

And for those of you in the United States, it’s coming on April 22. Details on the American tour will be posted soon. Click here and click here to pre-order. 

Let’s get back to talking about George Clooney now.

Yours in gossip,