Dear Gossips,

A couple of weeks ago, TMZ had video of Paulina Gretzky, Wayne Gretzky’s daughter, leaving an LA restaurant wearing an outfit that, um, demanded to be noticed. Wayne Gretzky is a big ass deal in Canada. So, you know, anything that has anything to with Gretzky and for us it’s an automatic click. I remember thinking to myself - oh this girl, this girl wants it so bad and so hard and it is happening SOON. There’s a moment there - can you see it all over her face? - where her desperation reveals itself and, drawn by the camera, she almost starts posing right there on the sidewalk. The video is below.

Not sure what held her back that night but whatever restraint she had on that occasion was totally ineffective on Instagram. You can see all her best Instagram shots here. I’m partial to the one where she’s spread between a man on one side and a girl on the other and, thankfully, she shaved that day.

It’s sh-t out there, sure, wherever you are. And then on top of the regular sh-t there’s the LA sh-t, when you’re surrounded by young twats born to Real Housewives who just want their own Kardashian show and not much else. What chance do they have?

Yours in gossip,