Dear Gossips,

Girl Sh-t is the Best Sh-t, as you know. It’s one of the enduring themes of this blog. But... and I hate to be a buzzkill... but Girl Sh-t has to be legit. And it wasn’t legit Girl Sh-t between Elisha Cuthbert and April Reimer. Video Assumption TOTALLY suggested it. And of course the subsequent GIF that made its way across Twitter, but Reimer explained, equally quickly, on Twitter, obviously, that they were reacting to a rude comment from a fan sitting close by. Which I can believe because, well, that’s what happens at hockey games -- fans say stupid sh-t, and I know this because I say stupid sh-t. Like, sh-t you’d be embarrassed about if you knew the player’s family was listening.

So, instead of Girl Sh-t, it was actually commiseration. And April posted a photo to support that. Believe me, I’m as disappointed as you are. But these are the risks we take with Photo and Video Assumption. It’s also the difference between good gossip and, you know, like, STAR Magazine.

Sorry...? Let me make it up to you. Because you know who’s always good for good, old-fashioned, legit Girl Sh-t? Please. Gwyneth Paltrow, obviously.

Yours in gossip,