Dear Gossips,

The Halloween theme on etalk yesterday was Vegas. From left to right, here we are: Devon Soltendieck as Criss Angel, Traci Melchor as Cher, Tanya Kim as Shania Twain, Ben Mulroney as Liberace Behind The Candelabra with Alex, our talent coordinator playing his Scott, me, and Danielle McGimsie as Britney Spears. To clarify, I was Elton John. But some people thought I was trying to be Psy. What I was really trying to be was a dude for a day. Because on The Social I became Justin Bieber.

This is how I walked around all day, with my eyes all f-cked up and my mouth open, hunched over, shuffling with a stutter step. Every woman in the building ran away from me. They were skeeved. But whyyyyyyy? Click here to see an Instavid of me creeping people out with my Bieber-ness. Once in a while, for no particular reason, I’d shout out SWAGGY just for kicks. The women wanted to vomit. It works for the real Bieber though. It works very, very well. It works on young groupies, it works on older groupies, sometimes it works on family groupies. Maybe my crotch wasn’t dropped low enough? Click here to see more pictures. And click here to see me limping into the studio, making a grand JB entrance at the top of the show. Yeah OK. I’m totally gross.

Have a great weekend

Yours in gossip,