Dear Gossips,

The thing about Justin Timberlake, even though he does a great job on Saturday Night Live, is that it’s only ever funny on his terms, when he gets to dictate and participate. Otherwise you get the impression that he actually takes himself very seriously, that his sense of humour isn’t as fresh or as cool as they keep trying to tell us it is. How then do you think he’s dealing with it now that his wedding jump cockblock of his own bride has become a meme? Wait, no, never mind. Is it all about him and not about her? Yeah? OK well then he probably loves it.

PEOPLE released an alternate cover for his big pink wedding. At least this time his wife was allowed to stand up in the photo. Britney, however, is still prominently positioned in the corner. Obviously JT doesn’t like this one as much. You can only see half his face, his eyes are closed, and his nose looks smushed from the kissing.

Meanwhile over at US Weekly, they’ve decided to challenge PEOPLE’s Timberlake wedding exclusive with a newsstand MiniVan Majority favourite -- Weight Loss! And this time starring Jessica Simpson who’s apparently being “Bullied For Her Weight”. It’s a pretty smart strategy.

Wedding vs Weight After Baby -- how is a woman to choose!?!?

Yours in gossip,