Remember when James Franco reviewed Ryan Gosling’s performance in The Place Beyond The Pines? Click here for a refresher. He was crushing, hard. Too hard. Too extra. It was patronising. It was a compliment to cover the snark.

He’s just done it again with Jake Gyllenhaal. In his new piece for Vice, Franco calls Gyllenhaal a “night-crawling master”. But he opens by describing Jake’s work in Nightcrawler as “an acting-career comeback”. Um…when was Jake Gyllenhaal ever Lindsay Lohan? For every Prince Of Persia, there’s a Your Highness. It’s not like James Franco has never done a big budget feature. And you wouldn’t call Spring Breakers his “comeback”. Prince Of Persia was Jake’s attempt at box office hunk super stardom. It didn’t work. But I’m not sure anyone but Franco would say that he required a comeback.

But Gosling and Gyllenhaal are two actors who live where James Franco lives – and they’re doing it better. They’re peers. They are successful peers. That’s what this is about: condescending to your peers. Because he writes sh-tty poetry and can slap together a sculpture now and again, Franco seems to be asserting that he’s above the Goslings and the Gyllenhaals, that he has the credentials to assess them, to judge them, to declare them worthy.

Thanks James Franco! That’s exactly what Ryan Gosling and Jake Gyllenhaal were sitting around hoping for.

Jake had a busy weekend. Right now he’s on the long list of Oscar Best Actor potentials but there’s a lot of work to be done if he wants a spot among the five. Here he is at the Governors Awards on Saturday night and last night he was the AFI Indie Contenders panel with Marion Cotillard, Tilda Swinton, Bill Hader, Kristen Stewart, JC Chandor, and Damien Chazelle. 

A few weeks ago, I suggested Gossip Genie-ing a Kristen Stewart/Jake Gyllenhaal hookup. Click here for a refresher. Are you down with that? A reader called Andrea just emailed me this photo. It could work, non? Jake is DEFINITELY an upgrade on the other guy.