Team Aniston"s clever spin
Without a doubt, the biggest story of the day: Us Weekly"s bold pronouncement that Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn are engaged. Not exactly a surprise considering it"s been building for months now but what WAS surprising was the fanfare surrounding the report and the clever way it"s been launched around the world.
The American weeklies usually go to print on Monday, by Tuesday afternoon, certain stories are leaked to the mainstream papers and the blogs to generate interest in newsstand sales. Sometimes though, if a particular scoop is particularly juicy, the magazines will keep their covers cloaked, preferring instead to let the bomb drop with a loud enough thud the next day. In this case, no one had a whiff of Us Weekly"s coup until this morning, when Janice Min supported her brand with an interview on the Today Show, during which she confidently declared that they had "multiple sources" and one "very, very good" account.
But as quick as you can say "not so secret cocaine habit", Aniston"s super flack Stephen Huvane released a statement from the Team: She is wrong. There is no engagement.
On the surface, it looks like the makings of a full on battle, especially since Us Weekly quickly retorted on their blog, pretty much calling Huvane a liar and listing 4 previous fabrications he"s made with regards to his most attention starved client. But while it appears as though Us is throwing down the bloody gossip gauntlet, consider that the resulting tit for tat, word for word war has actually turned the engagement cover into a bigger deal than it was ever going to be in the first place, giving the story longer legs than it would have had if the whole situation just came and went. I mean, think about it. Since May, when press for The Break Up was starting to pick up momentum, has there been a week that"s gone by withOUT a "they"re getting married! At Oprah"s house!" angle???
Also for your consideration: Us Weekly is EXCEEDINGLY specific with the details they"ve provided. They claim to know the precise date of the engagement (June 27), they claim to know where it happened (during a flight back from Mexico), they even claim to know how Vince originally planned to propose and why he changed it up. Now if you"re a tabloid junkie, you should be familiar with the tabloid tale telling standard - vague on logistics, vague on timing, vague on everything but the crux: "pregnant! Divorcing! Anorexic!". If you need an example, please see Life & Style Weekly - they suck donkey ass. Officially.
This time, however, Us Weekly"s information is so exact, you just know it came from an inside leak. And these days, when it comes to Jen"s "protective" and publicity-savvy entourage, it"s hard to believe the leak wasn"t sanctioned. And if the leak was sanctioned, it"s hard to believe Stephen Huvane wouldn"t know about it. A publicity virtuoso is he … n"est-ce pas?
Because not only does his star grace the week"s most exciting cover, the "controversy" surrounding it has elevated the situation from just another Hollywood engagement to THE HOLLYWOOD ENGAGEMENT that everyone is talking about.
Roll your eyes all you want, laugh it off all you want, but remember - she isn"t on the A list by accident. Jennifer Aniston, for all the mediocrity, can play it with the best of them. And if you"re willing to believe that some celebrities will go to great lengths to make babies or to hide babies or be gaygays and hide gaygays, why wouldn"t you believe that two celebrities would get into bed with a tabloid to stoke public fascination with their love lives?
Oh wait. She"s America"s golden sweetgirl, right? She"s totally not insecure, right? She"s totally not ambitious, right? She"s not vain and starving or famewhorish, right? She would be your best friend in a Hollywood second, right?
Please.
If you believe that, you probably still believe that Clay Aiken ain"t gay. War or not, conspiracy or not, Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn are engaged. And they desperately want you to know about it without wanting you to know that they want you to know. Get it?
PS. Did you know that "Vince Vaughn"s Wild West Comedy Show was among the world premieres announced yesterday at the Toronto International Film Festival . The festival added 15 world premieres and five international premieres to the films expected to ATTRACT BUYERS at the 31st annual festival Sept. 7-16"
Totally just a coincidence, right???