Jennifer Aniston…

She’s “Fabulous and 40!”

Fabulous at 40!

Fabulous at 40!

For f-ck’s sake we’ve been hearing it for an entire month…

Fabulous at 40!

And the MiniVan screaming their support, believing their girl is taking them along on the ride, redefining beauty, embracing age, representing THEM. Representing YOU?

Can you afford 40 thousand POUNDS – POUNDs!!!!!!! – to fly your personal hairstylist to Europe first class just to make sure your hair is perfect while promoting your new movie?

Please.

You won’t read about this in People Magazine. Because People Magazine perpetuates the notion that celebrities are relatable, an insidious illusion that has created in some a false sense of familiarity with their favourite stars based on the bullsh-t notion that they could totally be their friends, they could totally live their lives.

Jennifer Aniston is the reigning queen of selling this fraud. Her fans are the undiscerning amateurs who truly believe that she is who she says she is, nothing more, nothing less: the girl next door.

But only if you live in Malibu with a $15 million house.

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File photos from Wenn.com