It is not uncommon for us all to shudder when Jennifer Garner puts on a dress – not on a red carpet, but when she’s running errands, being mom to Violet and Seraphina. If you have no memory of this, please click here. Now you know.

The other day, Taupe stepped out in this printed blue and white summery dress and I mentioned to Duana how much I liked it, on standalone, but wondered why on her it looked so bad. Duana explained that it has something to do with the size of the print. Something about tall girls wearing big prints and short girls wearing small prints or vice versa, I can’t remember. As you know, Duana has a PhD in dressing for height.

I’m not sure the print, or rather the size of it, is the issue here though. The problem(s) is/are the other decision(s) she’s making with the dress. Like those goddamn shoes. What are those goddamn shoes?

Some of you are about to yell at me like, shut up Lainey, she’s just a mom and she’s doing mom things and is comfortable and shouldn’t be judged on her clothing, it’s not a runway.

Fair enough. I would accept this argument if she was wearing schlubs. If there really was no effort involved. I agree. When a mom steps out and she’s in her yoga pants and a dirty t-shirt, you are right to tell me to lay off.

But I PROMISE you this dress is not a schlub. I promise you this dress isn’t cheap. She bought it and she wanted to wear it, particularly on this occasion last week because she thought it was a good outfit. In other words, this is not an accidental outfit. She thought about it. She liked it. So can we go back sh-tting on those f-cking shoes now?

Speaking of shoes, and a dress comparison too – over in Paris, Meg Ryan and her boyfriend John Mellencamp went on a loved up stroll today. As you can see, unless I’m bug-eyed, which is very possible, Meg is wearing the same dress. And she, also, hasn’t chosen the best footwear to go with it. Are those tevas????

The crazy thing is, even though the tevas aren’t ideal either, I still prefer them to Taupe’s. Which says a LOT about Taupe. Considering hers are properly leather and not, like, meant for sightseeing. WHY is her dressing problem???


Photos from Flynetonline.com and KCSPresse/Splashnewsonline.com