People.com has an article today about what Prince William and Catherine were overheard to have said during their trip to LA last weekend. Most of it is pretty innocuous. Cute, but nothing super, super insightful. The point is, they’re chill, friendly, and supposedly unpretentious. Everyone liked them. And they are relaxed and easy with each other.

Then they asked some famous people to offer their observations on the future king and Queen. Nicole Kidman was predictably boring:

They make me smile.

???

Is anything alive up there anymore? Or do we have to wait 50 years for it to be cryogenically unfrozen?

The BEST BEST BEST quote comes from that sassy bitch Mary Louise Parker who, when asked what it was like to hang out with Will and Kate, replied:

“I didn't meet them. I was shoved out of the way by Jennifer Lopez. Uh oh, I shouldn't have said that.”

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did that just make your life? Because it totally, totally made mine. I already said JLo was a goddamn fangirl that night with the Cambridges. And it sounds like when JLo is a fangirl, she also goes all Chinatown on a bitch. You ever shop in Chinatown? In Chinatown you have to establish territory. There is no queuing in Chinatown. If you queue, you’ll be waiting for an hour and by the then the bbq pork will be sold out.

JLo knows about buying bbq pork, or getting her way at whatever the cost, no matter who’s in front of her, no matter the manners. Please. It puts these photos in a whole new perspective, right? As for Mary Louise, who has lived in New York a long time and isn’t exactly new to a little catfight, well, she couldn’t resist throwing down some shade either.


Photos from Kevork Djansezian/Pool/Gettyimages.com