Jessica Simpson lived up to my nickname for her last night at the Us Weekly Hot Hollywood Style Issue party in LA. Looks like a fluffer was hired to jerk off her hair. And she was honoured with the “Style Icon” award. Sure.

In fairness, this isn’t the worst she’s ever looked. I don’t hate the dress, and I don’t hate it on her. And those statements are wins when it comes to any discussion about Porny’s attire.

So why not Porny for X Factor? As reported yesterday – click here for a refresher – Simon Cowell has decided he wants Paula Abdul and UK judge Cheryl Cole on the US version. Nobody knows Cheryl. But everybody in America knows Jessica Simpson. And while it gives me a serious headache that her clothing line is a BILLION dollar enterprise, it doesn’t change the fact that people are buying her. There are people, many, many, many of them, out there buying her. How can this not be an advantage?

And it’s not like Jessica wouldn’t be good TV either. Imagine her trying to mentor her candidates. Please. I’m all over it. Now imagine her sitting next to that old wreck Paula Abdul competing over their candidates. PLEASE. I am entertained already. Isn’t that the point of television?

Simon Cowell is a smart guy. Very, very smart. Way smarter than me. He has an undisputed track record of success in this regard. I get it if no one wants to question his decisions. Having said that, everyone makes mistakes. Even very, very smart people. No one is infallible. I wonder…

Will Cheryl Cole be his Achilles Heel?

Maybe not. Maybe I’m way, way off.


Photos from Wenn.com and Flynetonline.com