When I saw these photos of my Porny on New Year’s Eve in Aspen with her golddigging future husband, I wondered whether or not I knew the meaning of real, profound love. The kind real, profound love that moves one to abandon all senses, especially sight, and waddle out of the house in reindeer tights like I don’t give a f-ck.

Perhaps I am too vain.

Anyway, everyone thought Jessica Simpson would close out 2010 with a wedding. So far, no wedding has been confirmed. It will probably take several more weeks to work out a pre-nup anyway. He’s making a list, you see, of all the things he wants. It keeps growing. Every time she wears something like this he adds another half million to his I Wants.

So now we wait for her to marry. And she will. She will steam her sh-t right into this mess some time this year and by the end of it there will be some baby things happening. For sure. Easiest prediction of 2011.

Photos from Flynetonline.com