Porny’s matchy matchy lace and length

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 21, 2010 09:26:19 April 21, 2010 09:26:19


It’s ... hideous.

My Porny Jessica Simpson is back in New York promoting the final episode of her beauty show. As you can see, Porny wanted to match. Jacket, dress, shoes. And a lace pattern. Sausage lace pattern. That cuts her off at the worst length.

F-ck them. They keep telling her it’s flattering. F-ck them for doing this.

But those massive guns. The tit shelf. I mean, the land mass of those cans, it’s like a continent. Continental breasts. They are everywhere. She’s, like, one giant boob. Oddly enough, given the right outfit, even showing some cleavage, it is possible for her to contain them without being overtaken by them.

Compare and contrast my Porny in red and short just hours later. See? So much better.

One step forward, 5 tits back.

Photos from Turgeon/Rocke/

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