Porny hides her ring...and not

Lainey Posted by Lainey at November 22, 2010 08:20:26 November 22, 2010 08:20:26

Jessica Simpson arrived in New York last night with her fiancé/professional escort and her father. This combination... I mean...

How would you like to hang out permanently with your fiance and your father? Look at the two of them side by side. They’re starting to have the same thighs. Gross.

Anyway, as she landed at the airport, surrounded by paps, Porny flashed her big ruby, and then fronted like she didn’t want anyone to see it anymore, covering it with her sweater. Dude, if you’re going to spend $100K on your own engagement ring, you may as well get as much mileage out of it as possible. Also, with all that leopard print, from the neck down, these days it’s hard to tell her apart from Mariah Carey. Coincidentally, both are releasing Christmas albums, and Porny was in New York on morning tv to promote hers today.

Of course she talked about the proposal. But within the first 30 seconds she also managed to talk about her bad breath. What is up with her mouth? She can barely open it anymore. It’s like her cheeks are permanently stuffed with gauze. And it always makes me laugh when her golddigger future husband is referred to as “former NFL star Eric Johnson”. That’s a gross misuse of the word NFL Star.

Anyway, notice that she’s so stupid she can’t keep her lies straight. When describing the ring, she keeps saying initially that “I wanted it to be different”. Then she changes her story and explains that it was all “Eric’s idea” from the very beginning. Except he didn’t have a credit card. Fascinating watching someone this f-cking dumb.

Photos from and and Brandon Todd/

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