Can Porny look like GOOPy?

Lainey Posted by Lainey at February 18, 2011 10:00:00 February 18, 2011 10:00:00

Porny’s getting married this year. So she’s trying to lean out, get into her dress. Her last trainer was Harley Pasternak. But Harley’s connected to John Mayer. And besides, Porny wants to look like GOOP.
Gwyneth’s body is aspirational?

That’s actually a business plan.

Gwyneth and Tracy Anderson, as you know, are in the gym business together. In other words, G’s tight body is trying to sell you something. Their latest client is Jessica Simpson. Jessica has been training with Tracy a few weeks now according to Us Weekly. Anderson confirmed to the magazine that she is indeed working with Porny four times a week for 75 minutes a time.

See? As I mentioned a few weeks ago, Anderson is building a very, very long celebrity list which more than makes up for Madonna’s business.

Anderson’s philosophy is that everyone, no matter what you look like now, can look like Gwyneth after. Not as tall, obviously, but that we can all achieve those sinewy lines, a dancer’s physique. For real. She claims her workout, her specific exercises, stimulate accessory muscles, and that in toning these accessory muscles, it pulls in the larger ones, reducing bulk. She’s also really against women lifting more than 3 lbs on either side, saying that promotes a buffness that contradicts her long and lean programme.

My trainer Hayley thinks she’s full of sh-t. She believes it’s irresponsible to make people believe they can take on forms their bodies weren’t meant to.

The question here is – can Porny take on GOOPy’s form?

Here’s Jessica with her KFed earlier this week after lunch in Brentwood. And file photos of Gwyneth from last year wearing shorts, showing off those legs.

Photos from and

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