Attention Kelly Preston: if this is coming up on your Google Alerts right now, shut down the computer and go have lunch with Rita Wilson. Trust me, girl, you’re not going to want to hear what the internet has to say today.

And why do I suspect Kelly Preston is scanning the blogs for her own name? Well, because after seeing  her husband’s new music video I now realize the Travolta/Prestons are in need of a win and they need this one to work out real bad.

The video I’m talking about is for the unfortunately named I think You Might Like It (you won’t). It’s a country Christmas duet that’s brought back together John Travolta and Olivia Newton John and it’s so bad it makes Rebecca Black’s Friday look like a masterpiece. The song is unimaginably trite, artistically reprehensible, and there’s just no accounting for it other than that in the wake of some seriously tragic sh-t, this family is desperately trying to distract themselves.

It’s unclear to me what the video is actually about. I think the plot is that Olivia has gone insane, so she steals a replica of the car from the final scene in Grease and convinces John to become Christmas’ answer to Bonnie and Clyde and then they just drive around Grinch-ing the gifts from under neighbourhood Christmas trees.

And this:

There’s also a subplot involving Kelly Preston and her children setting up a gay Army soldier with a security guard? The whole thing happens in a location as Christmas-classic as Jesus’s manger – the family’s private airport!

Not only does the video make zero sense, it doesn’t add up that something so seemingly homemade would be produced by one of the best connected and wealthiest men in Hollywood. The only possible explanation I can think of is that making something, anything, together as a family was more important than producing something good – and I get that. It can’t be easy to be a Travolta. I cried yesterday when my debit card was declined at Trader Joe’s, so if I were in this family, in the wake of a death and John’s cheating scandal, would I agree to participate in this piece of crap? Some non-Scientology fueled fun that kept everyone smiling for an afternoon and Mom and Dad out of a mental institution? Probably.  So maybe, for Kelly’s sake, even though we know we don’t like it, let’s just pretend.