It’s probably not true considering it comes from the UK Daily Express but I would very much like it to be. This story is so good. So full of sh-t but so good.

You may have heard that Nicolas Cage is broke ass. He’s blaming it on a shady manager who gave him bad financial advice and now he’s been forced to sell off all his castles and fortresses. Nic isn’t exactly completely innocent though. He was reportedly blowing his cash on half million dollar cars and dinosaur skulls too.

So now he’s scaling back his promotion on his new movie Bad Lieutenant, hiding out from embarrassment, and saving money where he can. Well no wonder he makes so many sh-tty movies. And he’ll KEEP ON making sh-tty movies to recoup some of his losses. We all lose.

But there’s a Johnny to the rescue.

According to the unreliable British rags, Johnny Depp supposedly feels indebted to Nic for kickstarting his career and has offered to bail him out. It’s totally a Johnny move. He is That Guy. Love him so much. And this would make me love him even more. I very much want to believe. But the source seems sketch.

Still…how embarrassing for Nic Cage. That Johnny Depp has to come pull up his broke ass. That in the end Johnny looks like a hero and he looks like a poor chump. Can’t be good for the ego.