Sit DOWN Johnny Depp

Lainey Posted by Lainey at October 4, 2011 17:20:47 October 4, 2011 17:20:47

Johnny Depp is promoting The Rum Diary. He sat down for an interview with Vanity Fair. ItΓÇÖs terrible. Maybe his worst.

First thereΓÇÖs the rape comment. When heΓÇÖs posing for a photo. When itΓÇÖs a photo shoot. When the camera is capturing a ΓÇ£sex symbolΓÇ¥, he compared the experience to being violated:

ΓÇ£Well, you just feel like youΓÇÖre being raped somehow. Raped ... It feels like a kind of weird -- just weird, man. But whenever you have a photo shoot or something like that, itΓÇÖs like -- you just feel dumb. ItΓÇÖs just so stupid.ΓÇ¥ (Source)

The images attached to this article were shot by Terry Richardson. It doesnΓÇÖt look to me like JohnnyΓÇÖs being attacked. Can a good actor make rape look pleasurable?

So heΓÇÖs bitching about having his picture taken, because people WANT TO SEE HIS PICTURE, because, you know, heΓÇÖs a Movie Star and all that, and in the next breath? Well, he talks about money. How much of it he has. And itΓÇÖs an obscene amount of money. Like, itΓÇÖs been reported that he made $300 million alone from Pirates 4 this summer. Just that one. Not including the 3 that came before. Not including Alice in Wonderland, the Chocolate Factory, not including all his other paycheques. But heΓÇÖs not greedy, no. DonΓÇÖt you ever say that about Johnny Depp. HeΓÇÖs just, heΓÇÖs just a loving father:

ΓÇ£Basically, if theyΓÇÖre going to pay me the stupid money right now, IΓÇÖm going to take it. I have to. I mean, itΓÇÖs not for me. Do you know what I mean? At this point, itΓÇÖs for my kids. ItΓÇÖs ridiculous, yeah, yeah. But ultimately is it for me? No. No. ItΓÇÖs for the kids.ΓÇ¥  

Great. All parents make sacrifices for their kids. Some work 3 jobs. Some clean toilets. Some commute 3 hours a day. The reward: their kids hopefully go to school, get a job.

Johnny? Johnny has to go to photo shoots. Have people fuss over his hair and makeup. Has to stand still for a long time. Suck in his cheekbones. Squint at the camera. Chain smoke every five minutes. And his reward?

His kids inherit more money than theyΓÇÖll ever need.


F-ck off. Shut up. Sit DOWN.

You donΓÇÖt get to be one of those assholes. Please donΓÇÖt be one of those assholes. Be grateful for the money. Be humble about the money. DonΓÇÖt talk about the f-cking money. Go get dressed up in your weird little outfits and dance around with the children. Mumble and stutter like youΓÇÖre an awkward artist who fell on fortune by accident. Anything, ANYTHING but this.

For more on Johnny Depp in Vanity Fair including what he said about trying out Scientology, click here.


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