Let me start your day by giving you the gift of Jon Hamm free-balling on the set of Mad Men. It’s that kind of morning. For me it’s the kind of morning where I feel like sh-t anyway so why not add to the grossness. The penis is not an attractive appendage. I don’t know why women behave like it’s the most awesome thing to look at. Is it? Maybe the problem is that I’m Chinese. And there are always sea cucumbers floating around in fish tanks at the entrances of all the Chinese restaurants we went to growing up. And we had to eat it. After looking at it waving around in milky water. This is what I’m seeing whenever Jon Hamm free-balls his way down the street. Floating moldy marine vegetation.

Season 7 of Mad Men will begin in the Spring for 7 episodes, part 1. Part 2 airs a year later. Do you think you might stop caring by then? Or do you care again because he’s free-balling?