A quick travel update: I’m at Heathrow. My flight was delayed over an hour in Vancouver which means I missed my connection to Nice, and now I have to wait 5 hours to get on the next one. Here’s a question if you work for an airline, and I’m not being facetious:

Why do you board people on the plane only to hold them there while you fix the mechanical problem? I’m down with spending as much time as you need fixing the mechanical problem, but in this case, the captain said they knew about the mechanical problem when the aircraft arrived in Vancouver earlier that day. And only when 300 passengers were sitting in their seats did they bother to call the engineers to come look at it? I fly enough to know that this happens all the time. And I really do understand about delays. I would however prefer to wait out the delay in the airport, where I can walk around, buy a bowl of soup noodles with wonton and bbq pork, get a cocktail at the bar, instead of sitting there, sweating, while you keep promising it’ll be another 15 minutes, translation 45 minutes.

Can we just reverse the order? You let us hang out in the airport, and take your time fixing the valve. Take all the time you want. Safety first, for sure. Just call me when you’re ready. I’m good.

Is it because they worry that passengers will be drunk by the time they get their sh-t together? That’s a huge leap of an assumption, non?

I’m sure there’s an official, logical, scientific reason for it. Please. I’d really like to know.

Anyway, had I boarded the proper flight to Nice, I think I may have been on the same one as Jude Law, who arrived today in Cannes as a member of this year’s jury, led by Robert DeNiro. Also, Rachel McAdams, whose film Midnight in Paris opens the festival tomorrow night. She looks kinda shellshocked at the crazy French pap situation parked at the airport. Legendary Chinese actress and Cannes favourite Gong Li was also photographed and then there’s Lady Gaga, who was shot just outside Paris but who will be on the Croisette, like prime time Wednesday night, on the Canal Plus stage, which is massive, doing an interview and then performing, free and live, to kick it all off… if that’s any indication of what the festival will be like this year.

So I’ll take this time at Heathrow, maybe park myself at a table at Wagamama in Terminal 5, for a few hours of peace and quiet, before the no-rest, balls out amazing Euro cheese and glitz that is the Cannes Film Festival.

Photos from KCSPresse/