Jacek and I were driving around the neighbourhood yesterday. There`s a high school nearby and in the afternoon, the kids are always out killing a few hours before they have to get home. A boy and a girl were sitting outside a coffee house. They could not have been more than 16, 17 tops. She was on his lap, facing out, his arms were wrapped around hers, her head leaning back on his, blissed out, they were both really, really attractive, like a Gap ad or something, and I, like an old perv, immediately started awwwww-ing them as we passed by, almost as though it were a tourist attraction. Literally, “Look Jacek! They`re SO cute!” Like you know when you go to a wedding, and the ring bearer and the flower girl come down the aisle dressed up in fancy clothes, they’re like 5 years old or something, and the whole congregation is getting drenched in sweetness?

I am officially one of those old bitches who sees teenagers as puppies.

Maybe this is why the Justin Bieber/Selena Gomez Hawaiian Tour of Love is making my life. Or, maybe they’re just hilarious, these pictures of them so swept up in each other, two baby hamsters revelling in the grownupness of their romance…as his mother lurks off camera because of course someone has to sign for the room service.

Come on. Don’t be crusty. Don’t snort and huff and ugh about how you’re so above it.

It’s funny! Look at them! Look at them the way they can’t NOT hold hands and touch and hug even on a jet ski! Look at how Boss he is leading his girl, always, like all chivalrous and sh-t. Look at his hand on her ass! This is supposed to convince you, by the way, not to see him as a boy anymore.

See? It’s funny!

It’s funny the way it’s funny when the ring bearer and the flower girl link arms and walk back down the aisle after the ceremony. It’s funny when kids play adults!

Do I think this is for real?

Hell yes. I think they are totally, crazy for real, the way only 17 year old kids can be completely SERIOUSLY for real about their for real sh-t. It’s first love for him. It’s EPIC for him. He’s becoming a Man for her. She’s the Woman for his Man.

I’m telling you. It’s funny!!!

Photos from Bauergriffinonline.com and Flynetonline.com and starsurf/Splashnewsonline.com