I didn’t think it could get any sexier in Cannes than Roberto Cavalli on a Segway. Please appreciate:

But then Justin Bieber came this year and decided he would take his shirt off as often as possible since Matthew McConaughey doesn’t do that anymore. Here he is, walking around the Croisette, giving you the moists between your legs.

Unfortunately for all of us, he couldn’t go topless at a jewellery party last night at the Hotel du Cap so he put on a blue leather shirt instead. Unfortunately for him, he still can’t grow man hair on his face. Fortunately for him, he was surrounded by models. He’s trying to say he’s a great lover. And I know you believe it.