Jennifer Aniston’s hand and footprint ceremony happened yesterday. It’s a much bigger deal than a star on the Walk of Fame. Conveniently timed of course for the release of Horrible Bosses. Just like her new boyfriend who was there, in the front row, right beside her producing partner, cheering her on, and receiving flying kisses from her periodically throughout the ceremony.

Oh it’s like that now, is it?

It’s everywhere, all the time, out in the open, no hiding, and so fast. Also... he groomed. Can’t have a ruffian accompanying the MiniVan Majority’s best girl, can we? Justin obviously got the order. He impressively Justin complied. He came to play.

And Jen didn’t wear black! It’s print and it’s pretty and it’s fresh and light and she looks great in it to show off those legs. But... see I would be upset about my Gucci heels getting concreted. Rich people who get free sh-t don’t have to worry about these things.

Here you come. I know it. With the BumpWatch, right? Her dress isn’t skin tight so that means she must be pregnant. I’m all for starting a pregnancy rumour. But please, we have to have more to go on that a loose dress and a photo from a certain angle. Please. Give me a waiter who says she’s not drinking. Give me a tip that she went to see an OB/GYN. Give me a photo of her trying on maternity clothes. Give me a shot of her leaving pre-natal yoga. ANYTHING but “her dress is loose and I maybe see a bump” because the wind blew a certain way.

Photos from