Arguments for:

  • He’s the Golden Son. The curly haired boy who became a mogul and never f-cked up along the way. And famous all over the world.
  • Saturday Night Live
  • Pippy is a philanthropist now
  • Always business: JT is expanding his clothing line. The SMA title would help sales
  • Pippy would like nothing more than to be called A Man. This smug bitch would like nothing more than to be called the Sexiest Man

Arguments against:

  • The Golden Son is still a boy. He sounds like a boy. He acts like a boy. We see him as a boy. He is an eternal boy. How do you go from Man Jackman to Boy Timberlake? It’s a stretch
  • The Open Road, remember The Open Road? The Open Road bombed. Saturday Night Live is isolated brilliance. But beyond Lorne’s safe haven, Pippy the thespian isn’t flying. And his repeated attempts are at once arrogant and also pathetic
  • The girlfriend shenanigans. The famewhoring Shelfy. Not an asset
  • Pippy is a pop star. He is not an actor. He’s working against a long list of formidable actors who actually make movies that people want to see. As already noted with Jay-Z, musicians probably fall behind even tv stars in this contest. And right now, Pip isn’t even about the music. Pippy hasn’t been about the music in 2 years

Odds: 15 to 1