Who’s the genius pushing Katie Holmes out so visibly on the weekend Tom Cruise is trying to sell Jack Reacher? If there’s anyone to challenge Blake Lively’s fame game, Jesus, it might actually be Katie Holmes. A year ago, this would not have been your answer. Katie Holmes! Is a baller! There’s her ex-husband, doing what he can, desperately, to make sure his latest movie isn’t a bomb at the box office, and Katie steps out, with an appearance of her own on Letterman, as if to remind us, for those who’d forgotten, that she left him in the dead of night, escaping the clutches of his cult, rescuing their daughter in the process...

It’s been six months but NEVER FORGET he’s a f-cking weirdo.

Is that the message?

Or is she really out there to promote her Broadway play? Really? It had to be THIS week? When the show runs well into February it had to be THIS week?

Coincidence or conspiracy?

They’re projecting $15 million or less for Jack Reacher’s first weekend open. And that it’ll maybe end up at around $80 million overall which, for a Tom Cruise action thriller, seems... pretty disappointing to me...

As Katie tosses her thick, dark, gorgeous hair over her shoulder, or twirls it between her fingers, leaning against the wall in the lobby of her apartment, saying a coquettish goodbye to her date... what?

According to the NY Daily News, that’s what went down when she was walked home the other night by a well-dressed man. Her rep insists that it was her “gay best friend” which, fine, but that only makes me even more doubtful because I feel like the gay best friend would have come upstairs instead of lingering by the elevators to talk. Whatever. No matter. The point is Tom’s in New York and since those crazy church people Google the sh-t out of themselves and their prophets, they would have read this and they would be aware...

Katie Holmes is still making them look stupid. Still.

Here she is, rather vampy, on her way in to Letterman in a purple dress. When she left she put on a pair of cuffed red trousers and booties and some of you are all like, that’s gross. Not totally. I love these pants. How can you not love pants that are at once structured but also comfortable? They sit flatteringly at the hip and they don’t jam into a camel toe -- what is the problem?

Well there are two problems. If she’d worn a simple black pump or an oxford, instead of the booties, you’d have a much different result. And it’s that blue coat too. At least it photographs blue. Because with the red and the black AND the blue, the effect is too haphazard, like pyjamas. Imagine instead a black leather jacket on top of the pants and a pair of oxfords with a chunky heel? Badass.

How is this person a fashion designer? She has no fashion instinct.