New interview with Katie Holmes, Queen Latifah, and Diane Keaton in Parade Magazine and KatE delivers a clinic in MiniVan Majority Fellatio. There’s love, there’s baking, there’s chocolate, there’s children, there’s sisterhood, and of course there is LOVE. All in time for the holidays.

Now THAT is a recipe for MiniVan perfect pie.

And also a slap in the face for the ex wife Granny Freeze who hasn’t been seen with her children in ages and recently told GMTV in the UK that her kids “don’t call me Mommy, they don’t even call me Mom. They call me Nicole, which I hate and tell them off for it.”

So they don’t refer to their own Mother as Mom…but they refer to RoboBride as Mom? Oh no they dih-int and oh yes she did. Oh yes Katie did… revealing to Parade that: 

“(Tom’s) first two children are incredible, really smart and kind. They call me “Mom.”

Now no amount of Botox is going to freeze the slap that just connected with Nicole Kidman’s face. And you can bet your boob job we’ll be seeing some new “candids” soon. Lovely photos of Nicole and Keith with Connor and Isabella totally not arranged (Nicole would never, right???) with a hired pap. Trust.

As for the rest of the Parade article… Katie lays the Rossum on higher than the Tom’s shoe lifts. 

On the Cruise Family Holiday: 
My whole family and Tom’s whole family will go up to Telluride [Colo.] again. We ski. We have big dinners and laugh. We love cooking. My mom’s stuffing is my favorite. I’m a huge fan of pie, especially pecan. I will probably cook some garlic mashed potatoes and maybe a cheesecake. We always make a lot of sugar cookies with decorating and sprinkles. Suri will be in the dough everywhere. Tom has shown me the greatness of extra chocolate chips. Tom’s really good in the kitchen. He makes great pasta carbonara and lemon pasta.

“Tom has shown me the greatness of extra chocolate chips.”

WTF??? 

Who scripts this sh*t? Seriously!

How Tom is sensitive: 
My husband has three sisters. He was raised by a single mother and has two daughters—and he’s a great father and husband. His first two children are incredible, really smart and kind. They call me “Mom.” So Tom understands the female bond, and he loves it. He was so excited for me to do this movie. He loved hearing all the stories.

But Tom is also a manly man:
Oh, we have so much fun. Tom has introduced me to so many new experiences. I have done things I never thought I would do, like climbing mountains and flying in the P-51 [a World War II fighter]. That’s what is so inspiring about being with him—constant thrills and joy.

Sweet Xenu…is it time to gather round in a circle, hold hands, and sing Kumbaya? 

Is this what women really want? Has everyone bought into the book of Oprah? 

Read the full interview here.


Photos from Splash