Katie Holmes in Melbourne on her cell phone looking like she’s caught up in an intense conversation. According to photographers, she appeared to be shouting, and extremely distressed. This is what my face looks like when my mother calls. 

It’s totally Photo Assumption, but let’s roll with it anyway.

Who’s she yelling at? 

Most obvious answer, obviously, would be Tom Cruise. He’s apparently not in town with her anymore, having left after his birthday weekend, whereabouts unknown, and mysterious. As always. He is stealth, that one, and as such is only seen when he wants to be seen. Trust.

As for what his wife is so pissed off about – no doubt Life & Style or In Touch will tell you all about it next week. These are perfect make-up-a-story pictures calling for a split. It’s been 3 or 4 months since the last time they were supposed to be divorcing so we’re due. But despite what you may have heard or read, chances are slim that Katie will be released any time soon. He still needs to follow up on the modest success of Valkyrie. He and Cameron Diaz are set to start shooting soon – and unless Cammie agrees to start pretend dating him (VERY unlikely) – they will not let personal drama overshadow his attempt at successful romantic comedy. 

Katie’s still in it for a while. 

Photos from Flynetonline.com