This is Keira Knightley yesterday in London at The Edge of Love afterparty in a gorgeous purple dress looking as healthy as ever. At least in her mind. Remember – she doesn’t have a problem, she’s never had a problem, and you’re not allowed to say she has a problem. Because there is no problem.

Keira according to Keira takes care of herself properly. And if you don’t believe her you’re just a mean gossipy asshole. Yeah, that would be me.

As for her famous pursed lips - a few readers have emailed to defend Keira’s morose mug. You say that the contrived depression is simply a smokescreen for her razorblade teeth. This is maybe the most amazing theory, like, ever.

So Keira knows her smile is scary (surely you’ve seen the underbite, bulimic jaw, crazy incisor combination, right?) and therefore never bares her teeth, resulting in the pouty pissy face we’ve come to know and love.

Makes sense to me.

Does she think of prunes too?

Photos from