Renee Zellweger, Keira Knightley… I call it Bulimic Jaw after my friend Dr Beth told me about the way the corners of a woman’s jaw start protruding after too much binging and purging. Keira Knightley however says she doesn’t have an eating disorder, has never had an eating disorder, and sued the Daily Mirror for suggesting she had an eating disorder.

What’s your call?

I’m starting to think perhaps she’s just made that way. Like Nicole Kidman and Audrey Tautou and even my Gwyneth…some women are born thin. Keira could be one of those? Indeed, she is certainly slight. But she’s also short. Look at her next to James McAvoy at the Venice Film Festival Opening tonight. He’s adorable, he’s beautiful, but he’s also pretty wee. Like 5 ft 7… MAX. And that’s being generous. I know. I stood next to him several times during TIFF last year and in heels I was looking down. I’m a measly 5 ft 3 which puts Keira around the same, perhaps an inch taller at 5 ft 4, not exactly an amazon.

She also doesn’t have that about to die look about her. At least not in the way Nicole Richie and Kate Bosworth did. And if we really have to get microscopic about it all, sure her collar bones are sticking out which some people can’t help, like me even when I’m chunky, but consider also that in Keira’s shoulders there is a healthy amount of muscle and an acceptable amount of flesh on her arms too. She’s definitely rather unattractive here but I wonder if that has less to do with her body than it has to do with her makeup and those eyebrows. While the dress is a dream, the rest is much, much, much too dark.

Can’t wait til she grows out of this “dark broody” stage – the predictable phase all 20 somethings go through when they start reading Camus and hating life. Give it a year.