Written by Duana


I don’t have foresight.

FIRST, my friend and colleague Shelley showed me a video wherein Kristen Bell irked her (and/or got in the way of enjoying her TV boyfriend Craig Ferguson.)

THEN I said she should send it to Lainey, who would no doubt feel the same way. I snickered at this dig-in-the-ribs-by-proxy I was sending. “Ooooh, someone else doesn’t like her, too. Wow, you guys should start a club!”

This was a mistake.

Because now here I am with you, trying to defend what may, in fact, be indefensible. Lainey was all ‘Kristen Bell is your girl, so…’

The video is here. (Most of the pertinent Bell stuff is in the first minute, although it does get markedly more amusing once she looks through the telescope thing).

Okay, yes. I get it. I do. I see what’s up. I think my beloved Veronica Mars would look at Kristen Bell and snort. She’s so…aware of herself. She’s aware that she’s cute, you know? And she’s never caught by the camera doing something funny or fun, she’s always…rehearsed. But then – would I mind if it were Sarah Silverman? Maybe not. Maybe it’s the placed-and-perfectness of the tiny blonde.

She also has that thing (and so do I and lots, so stand down) where her hair is too long for her age/demeanor now. I don’t know what it is, lots of people much older sport that same length, but – maybe she needs some layers or something. She looks like a high school girl, and the colour lacks…sophistication?

Ugh. I feel like such a traitor.

But Shelley pointed out that funny people like her. Ferguson brought her to Paris because she’s his very favourite guest. Dax Shepard obviously thinks she’s a delight. So maybe she’s one of those people - and I feel this too - who is funny enough around funny people, but can’t pull it out for herself. Like she’s not quite standup (or is too pretty, or whatever) but is great as someone else’s saucy gal.

Which would make sense, because as we saw from When In Rome (actually, I didn’t see it, but I should really get on that), the industry doesn’t know what to do with her. She should be bankable, and yet. She has a bunch of movies on the horizon(Everybody Loves Whales seems promising), so I’m sure she’ll enjoy a renaissance and then maybe everyone will love her and I’ll feel like a turncoat for writing this.

But I get it. She’s no Naomi Campbell, nobody’s reporting her for assistant abuse or terminal boredom a la Katie Holmes but – there’s not that same spark. Is there? Or are you the type who thinks there never was?

Ferguson, on the other hand…wow.


Photos from Wenn.com