Are we really looking at a DiCaprio-McConaughey staredown at the Oscars? Here’s why I would give it to McConaughey. Because despite what everyone says about this being the performance of Leo’s career, the movie was about out of control parties and debauchery and treating women like sh-t. So… how do you know it was a performance? How do you know that’s just not how he is at the party? He’s always at the party! Have you heard the stories about what used to go down at Jack Nicholson’s parties? That might have been 40 years ago but it doesn’t mean Leo’s not the heir to that empire.

But whatever. He won. This might be his best chance at finally winning an Oscar. And he’s up there and he’s trying out his speech and it’s not a bad speech, especially pointing out the fact that all these serious actors – Bale, Phoenix, etc – are included in comedy, which was funny, except…does he have something in the corner of his mouth? Is it an affectation? Is that why he said Philomena wrong when he was presenting Best Actress?

And he was orange too.