Brilliant Us Weekly comparison – on the left Lilo at 13. On the right her sister Ali at 13. Clearly times have changed. Should 13 year olds look this… experienced?

The expression in those eyes, the wanton dip of her chin, the suggestive pout – how many years, even months, before the next Lohan trainwreck hits TMZ?

I’m about to offend you, if you can’t handle, stop reading now.

I remember my aunt Irene used to tell me that grown women, mature adult women develop an eye – they can always tell whether or not a girl is a virgin. Something about the way they walk, the way they hold their bodies, I’m just saying – with Dina Lohan as her mother, 13 these days isn’t what it used to be.

And remember – Dina and Ali and her brother will be starring in a new reality series about Dina’s life as a single showbiz mother f&cking up her kids. So is there any wonder, any at all, why Ali looks like she’s already been plucked?

According to Dina, it’s because her children are “artists”:
“My daughters have an interest in the arts and I support them.”

Translation: I pushed my daughters to have an interest in the arts so that they can support me.