Matt & Lance: Texas tailchasing at its finest
They are, apparently, new BFFs. Single, horny, hot, fit, and constantly lookin" to score. What"s not to love?
Have we talked about my once upon a time obsession with Lance Armstrong yet? Three years ago, almost exactly. Just after his fifth tour victory, post-Kik, pre-Sheryl, I fancied him hardcore. He"s a stellar athlete, he"s cocky, he"s an asshole, he"s only interested in himself, sexy as all hell, totally my type, and instant top status on the Freebie Five.
A few months later, along came Crow. Naturally I hated them on sight. Naturally I didn"t think she was good enough for him. Naturally, of course, she won me over and I was all over their love. Which brings us to present day. He"s now single, he was a sh*t to her, and because of that, my old devotion hasn"t come back. In fact, the devotion has been displaced... all the way over to Sheryl"s side. Funny how that works, non?
So check out Matt & Lance & their bonding journey as illustrated by Us Weekly - two happy playboys frolicking away their 30s, providing sweaty pleasure to a bevy of lucky ladies including one Lindsay Lohan.
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Say wha????