Written by Sasha


Hi Sasha - I'm a chapstick-kind-of-girl. But lipstick looks gorgeous on women and I always think I want to upgrade. However, when I buy lipstick, I put it on, it dries up and comes off w/in 2 hours, and I never use it again. Do you have any types (gloss, stain, etc) or brands that you could suggest for a person like me? LH

LH you’re preaching to the choir. Finding a good shade that you don’t digest in 15 minutes is hard to track down. And as you point out, there’s nothing worse than putting on something that crusts out your lips so much that you look like you’re dying of dehydration. Take Angelina Jolie for example. Listen, it wouldn’t be a hard sell to turn lezzie for Angie, but girl needs to slap something on those lips - they be lookin’ dry. And remind me again, they’re not fake? Because lately, they look a tad Lisa Rinna. Lainey, what’s up with that?

Now, there are lots of things that I love to share with people – my favorite jeans, perfume, comfortable t-shirts- but I’ve always been one big selfish ho’ when it comes to sharing what lipstick I use, specifically this one kind. But because I’m trying to be a better person in life, I’m going to let it out of the vault.
But people, if I do this for you then you need to do some hard campaigning so that one day I can be sponsored for life; I’m kind of serious here.

I’m warning you, this brand is random as hell but it’s the sh-t and people always ask me what I have on. So here’s the deal, it’s called Magic Kiss and it’s mood lipstick. Yah yah I’ve seen the knockoffs too, but you have to get this exact brand. It’s the best – it lasts literally for hours (sometimes I wake up with it on) and it’s the perfect mix of color and moisture all at the same time. Now the kicker is my mom always brings it back from Hawaii and I always just assumed it was this exotic stuff and that somehow I was special but…… good news, I’m not special all. I just found it online and it’s cheap as f-ck. So LH, click and BUY!

One step closer to being a nicer person. Don’t know if it was worth it.

Sasha, I am an early thirties mom, and I'm going home to my sister in-law's house for the holidays. I want to look, in order of importance, 1.) good and as thin as possible (she is skinny as f*ck and talks about she "forgets to eat" because she's "so busy"--STFU!), 2.) sophisticated (she wears a 2 carat diamond on her finger, 1 carat diamonds in each ear, but carries a no-name handbag and wears Payless shoes--GAUCHE!) 3.) effortless (I'm sure she judges me every moment (as I do her) so I don't want to give her the satisfaction of knowing that I give a sh*t--I<3HOLIDAYS!), and 4.) I'd like the outfit to go with these shoes because I don't want to buy/pack another pair. Can you guide me? LG

LG, you just cracked me up. I love that this trip is all about a mutha f-cking showdown. I now feel dedicated to help you in this cause.

First things first - I’m hoping that the link of the shoes you sent me are the black versions. If yes, I can work with this. If they aren’t: abort and find a pair of black shoes. Sorry, tough love.

Now, when it comes to holiday garb I really don’t like coughing up a bunch of dough – I want cute, easy and somewhere in the mix there needs to be a hint of sparkle. And French Connection is great place to start. Do you have one close to you? If you don’t, these looks are easy to recreate.

So first on your priority list – you want to look like you’re starving but really really happy about it, right? For that, find yourself a really form fitting flattering dress and this one is simple but is still a bit special. Put on some black opaque tights and trust, she’ll be cranking her 2 carat neck to check you out. And if this neckline is a tad too slut for the holidays, stick a black camisole underneath. Oh and this dress also checks off the sophistication box.
And if that’s too dressy then sweater dresses/tunics are such a great way to go. H&M and Banana Republic have some great ones in right now. Pair it with some black leggings and they’ll look great with your desert boots. Now here’s a big rule about leggings: do not treat them like pants. Ok? They are not pants. They don’t look like them, they don’t feel like them, they are nothing like them. So don’t go tucking your blouses in and don’t wear short tops. A general life rule: cover the cooch.

On to effortless. Really there’s nothing easier than three pieces of clothing. A pair of slim black jeans (gap makes a great pair), a plain black silk blouse or your favorite black top, and then throw on this cardigan.

And if you’re doing just some Sunday lazing around then shove yourself back into those black jeans and pair it with this sweater. Um, it’s pretty amazing.

Now more importantly, is there any way you can hook me up with picture evidence of this holiday get together….please?

Are skinny jeans really going out? Are they an ill-advised purchase at this point? And if so, what to replace them with...? I don't know if I can do the high-waisted wide-leg 70s thing. .SSK

SSK, you’re not alone in this skinny vs flare debate. There have been a lot of LG readers wanting to know what to do. Skinny is definitely not out, it’s just that the wide leg is making its way back in. But forget about high-waisted; that happened for a minute. And I think everyone who had a pair and saw Jessica in her heinous outfit at that chili-off burned that trend and moved on. Question: would a chili-off be a good get for LeAnn Rimes these days?

Obviously you know I have a bias towards a skinny or a straight leg, especially when you plan to dress things up a bit. And I feel pretty strongly that if you plan on wearing high boots this winter you need a skinny jean underneath. I have a real problem when women slap on boots with a loose fitting jean, you know the look, where it gets all saggy around the knee area – major fashion buzz kill.

But although I’m a skinny jean advocate I know it’s not for everyone. And if you’ve flipped through any fashion mags lately you’ll see that the wide leg (which broadens out around the knee area) is making its comeback for spring. I do love the look when you’re kicking around with a cute pair of kicks/flip flops but where it gets tricky is when people try to dress the wide leg up….

And to be honest, I don’t know if it’s just the word ‘flare’ that makes me cringe or if it’s that if they’re worn wrong it can look hella budget. So here’s the thing: if you’re going to go flare than invest in a really nice pair for going out. They can’t just be the ones that you wear on the weekend that are all fray at the bottom - they have to be a great fit and rich in color, so look for a dark solid denim blue or black. Check out lines like Blank (easy on the wallet), Genetic Denim and Fidelity.

SSK, I hope this helps. And if you’re a fickle spazz like me, you’ll have one of each style in your closet.