Who ARE you?

Been saying it for weeks. I don’t get it. I don’t get what Madonna sees in Alex Rodriguez. He’s a fecking LOSER.

But clearly we’re missing something. Or clearly her yearning for youth is clouding her judgment. Because our Madge is not only smitten with ARod, she’s also turning into a sap.

Last night at her show in Miami, as ARod was sitting front row next to Guy Oseary, Madonna supposedly serenaded him with You Must Love Me. Some even say there were tears in her eyes.

OK, that must be a stretch. Like please. Cannot bring myself to imagine Madonna choking up on stage in song. ROSSUM!

She did however lean over and grab a bottle of water from him as he clapped enthusiastically throughout the performance. That’s more like it. Make him your bitch.

This during Thanksgiving holiday celebrations in the US as ARod was spotted the other day with his ex wife and their children shooting down all speculation of animosity between them.

Many see this as a sure sign that ARod and Madonna will slowly step out publicly, cementing their status as a couple, especially now that she’s chosen NYC as her permanent residence and with the tour tentatively ending next month.

Seriously, I’d rather listen to her I Love New York lyrics than see her holding hands with ARod. Ew!