“I thought it was her daughter”

Is what Jacek said when I told him this was a new Madonna song. I thought that was an appropriate title to this article.

It’s apparently a demo from her forthcoming new album. The song is called Give Me All Your Love. Billboard has been streaming it for an entire day so...that tells me it’s totally legit. Another sign that it’s legit?

Well, frankly, it sucks.

Not just the tune but the lyrics.  And that’s what gives it away. Madonna’s lyrics have always been embarrassingly...like horribly... like incomprehensibly, really, really bad. I mean, she’s purportedly well read and cultured, you know? Why then do these word combinations happen...and so frequently?

Don’t play the stupid game
‘Cause I’m a different kind of girl
Every record sounds the same
You gotta step into my world

Is it terribly bitchy of me to say that Madonna, for all her “experience”, should be able to figure out that using “the” in front of “stupid” in this context sounds, um, super ESL? This is what happens when you try to jam words onto a specific amount of beats. Which, 20 years ago, she used to do all the time. Is it unfair to expect that she would have evolved?

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