Mandy Moore is a lovely, lovely celebrity. Bit contrived of late with all the introspection and sh*t, but in relation to her peers, Mandy is a doll. She also doesn’t starve herself and eats like a normal person. Love her.

Which is why it sucks that she has, like, the worst taste in men.

Wilmer Valderrama is a skeeze. Andy Roddick is a douchebag. Anyone who follows tennis can tell you that. Zach Braff is a pig. And DJ AM? No explanation necessary.

Turns out Mandy is single again. This time because her boyfriend’s balls were too small. It is weakness that has broken her heart. A lack of courage, a coward hiding behind “art”…

Sit DOWN Ryan Adams.

OK! Magazine is reporting that Ryan has broken up with Mandy because he couldn’t handle the pressure from the paparazzi and the attention from the tabloids. Oddly enough, his aversion to celebrity media still did not prevent him from releasing a statement to the magazine confirming the split:

"Mandy is one of those genuinely sweet angelic people you wish to meet your whole life. I am grateful for our friendship and how it allowed us both to grow and learn more.

Unfortunately I am allergic to paparazzi and have found the best antidote to that sort of nonsense is staying behind the guitar and typewriter, staying close to my support group of friends and band mates and not engaging in activities that prevent me from taking care of myself or others," he says. "I found the entire speculation and subsequent photographs and intrusions terrifying and only wish to live as normal a life as possible, so that I might always remain punk as f*ck AND sober.”

Sorry loser but isn’t the active pursuit of being “punk as f*ck” the very antithesis of being “punk as f*ck”?

Weak, weak little man.

When will Mandy find a nice boy? How about Taylor Kitsch? Why am I always trying to set up Taylor Kitsch? Why am I his mother?