What a great start to Memorial Day Weekend for those of you in America:

Mimi on GMA.

It had all the elements of a classic Mimi appearance:

-She needed help walking. Several times. She SUMMONED help walking. Several times.

-Her dress almost fell off. Because she always wears clothes that are too small. Wait, what the f-ck am I talking about? Mimi is a size 2. If you don’t believe me, check the labels (all of which have been manually reset by her staff).

-She blames Donatella Versace for her the fact that her pink sequined formal gown (at 8am) couldn’t contain her

-She kicks off her shoes as she sits down on her stage-throne, and then for some reason the entire performance becomes a commercial for ... shaving cream? All I could focus on were her legs. It’s like she was in the bathtub.

-She complains, repeatedly, that she doesn’t have enough time for all her costume changes

-She complains, repeatedly, that it’s too early for her to function

-She treats Miguel like he’s her backup singer

And my favourite part of it all...

How often they keep complimenting her -- Mariah, you are so gorgeous, Mariah you are so fit, Mariah you are so gorgeous, Mariah you are so thin.

And you know why?

It’s because THEY ARE TOLD TO.

Have I mentioned this before? I know several people who’ve interviewed Mimi. And it was suggested to each and every one of them, in advance, that they tell her how pretty and skinny she is, often.

Now enjoy if you haven’t already. And if you have, we’ll enjoy it again, for the 3rd time, together.

Also attached -- Mimi walking around NYC carrying a stuffed lamb.