Dear Gossips,

The funniest article I read yesterday was written by one of Kathleen’s favourites, Rembert Browne for Vulture called Discussion Over: Nelly Was Bigger Than Drake. Not quite as funny as a Nelly video, because, as I’ve mentioned several times over the years, nothing makes me laugh like a Nelly video, but there are some glorious lines in this glorious piece that deserve your attention. We are currently living in Peak Drake. So the debate here is whether or not Peak Drake is greater than or less than Peak Nelly. Rembert is clear on his answer:

“The band-aid on Nelly’s face was dumb, but not dumb enough for me not to put a band-aid on my face a few times even though my cheek was woundless.”

Also this:

How many Drake songs does your grandma know? I bet the answer is zero — “Charged Up” never really registered with the octogenarians. “Hot in Herre,” however? I swear I’ve heard that song at a baptism.

It’s so f-cking true! Where HAVEN’T you heard Hot in Herre???

Curiously both Nelly and Drake were born under the sign of the Tiger. Tiger is coming on Friday. Today belongs to the Dragon.

Dragons could be very powerful during the Year of the Rooster. The goal though is to maintain peace and quiet. No fighting. Both Rihanna and Emma Stone are Dragons. If Dragons can avoid drama, the year should be relatively smooth, relationships should be solid, and there’s also a high possibility of fertility.

1928 Dragons are well taken care of, you won’t have to worry.

1940 Dragons may enjoy much respect and honour this year. But there are some stress factors, including an injury alert. Be extra cautious.

1952 Dragons might experience good money luck.

1964 Dragons could attract a lot of attention, people might notice your efforts, your skills, but look after your body and do not overextend, budget your energy wisely.

1976 Dragons will find support in what they take on this year. Male Dragons born this year must be particularly careful about health though and a big birthday is recommended for all 1976 Dragons.

For 1988 Dragons, the Year of the Rooster will be a year of learning. Take as many lessons as you can. Receive knowledge whenever it is offered. This is an investment in yourself that will reveal its benefits later on.

2000 Dragons are advised to avoid high risk activities. You may get hurt.

The love outlook is strong for all Dragons this year. Health, however, will have its ups and downs. Take good care of your body. You’ll never be able to fully enjoy anything if your body isn’t with you. In October and November you must closely monitor your financial matters and put a lot of thought into who you can trust. The wrong person could devastate you.

Tomorrow: Rabbit

Yours in gossip,

Lainey